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Teachers Behaving Badly
Leave no lesson plans for the sub. Leave lesson plans that consist of "Videos are in the closet, sub lesson plans are in the draw [sic] under the flag." Leave a video marked "Berlioz the Bear" in a cassette box marked "Berlioz the Bear," tape over it with something about a boys' choir, and fail to mark it in any way.
What I ended up doing today: showing a boring-ass video called "Barn Dance" featuring LeVar Burton talking about bluegrass music. Let me tell you, first graders don't care how you make a fiddle. When that didn't work, I played a Disney-type pop song about friends all around the world and the different ways to say hello. Hey, it's language-related, and there was a worksheet with some interesting questions on it. That worked much better for two classes. Then some teacher who clearly has been teaching since the Reconstruction and was looking forward to her 1/2 hour off showed up, dropped the kiddies off, and said I was best off using a video.
That's when I made the discovery about Berlioz the Bear.
Plus? It only lasted ten minutes, not the half-hour promised on the box. Which left us with Part II of "Barn Dance," which only lasted another 15 minutes. At which point there were like 3-4 minutes left, so I decided to put my minimal (and rusty) piano skills to work. I played "Name That Tune" with them for a couple of minutes, thinking the teacher would be there imminently. No teacher. Then one kid played some of "Spinning Song" on the keyboard; still no teacher. It's now 5-10 minutes late (keep in mind the music lesson is 1/2 hour). I start playing "Simon Says" with them out of desperation. Finally, a good 15 minutes late, she shows up. No apology, and the kids were there, so I couldn't bitch-slap her into submission.
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